


it’ll be us one day

by ohallows



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: (hey ao3 maybe focus on adding options for nonbinary people!!), Canon Compliant, Fluff, Future Fic, Literal Sleeping Together, Other, so about that boat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:55:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26984770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohallows/pseuds/ohallows
Summary: Cel and Barnes, after.
Relationships: Commander James Barnes/Celiquillithon "Cel" Sidebottom
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	it’ll be us one day

**Author's Note:**

> oh i love writing fic for a pairing that doesn’t even have a relationship tag. anyway i have Fully fallen into celbarnes 
> 
> special shout out to noot this was like 90% because of my conversations w her and i would like to give them credit for the inspo
> 
> barnes is so hard to write ngl

It’s strange, winning. Not because you’ve  _ won,  _ per se, but because, well. What are you supposed to do next? The mission that you’ve tied yourself to for so long is gone, is  _ complete _ , and you’re left staring at the open void of choice and decision ahead of you, wondering what to do next.

This isn’t a new feeling for Cel, not really; they’ve been around for a while, now, staring out into the endless black of not having anything to  _ really  _ do next isn’t something they’re unused to. Still, it’s a bit, uh,  _ bigger  _ than before; the void looks a little bit deeper than they would like, and everyone seems a bit hesitant to move on. As though they can’t really accept that it’s all over, that they won, and that it’s time to, well. Pick a new mission, as it were.

It’s not that easy. It never has been - and they’ve had to pick a new mission a  _ lot  _ in their life. Traveling across America had been that mission for a while. And then going to the western coast of Africa, cutting across the continent to get to Asia. And then India. Always curving around Europe to the best of their ability, giving it as wide a berth as they could. They’d settled into the village soon enough, and then that had been their mission for a while. Protecting them. Teaching Jasper. It hadn’t lasted as long as they wanted; they hadn’t  _ needed  _ Cel for as long as they would have liked, but that’s  _ okay,  _ right, because it means they can protect themselves, and that means Cel  _ helped  _ them, and that’s more important than being needed, really. 

And then they leave to save the world, and Cel realises that they can protect themselves, and it just… feels a bit strange, to go back there. They know that they’d be welcomed with open arms, but something about it feels stagnant. Feels like a retreat. 

So Cel follows the party back to an inn in London, after the infection has been mostly contained, and they work through the aftermath alongside their friends, and they try to push off the feeling that this is an ending more than it is a beginning. It takes a  _ while  _ for the world to get out more into a semblance of order; as the people with the most understanding about the infection, their little group gets called on the most to handle any issues, and it’s a few months before everything is in order enough to really think about moving on from this.

For a bit, there’s an uneasy agreement to stay together - it’s been months, sure, but everyone’s so hesitant to leave because they know the second they do, something bad will come. Cel knows all too well the guilt that sits heavy on your shoulders when you walk away too early, when there’s a terrible tragedy you could have prevented if you were just  _ there.  _

They sit in a hotel room in London, each waiting with baited breath as they wait for the next missive to prove them all right. A week passes, and nothing happens; then another week, then a month, and then everything seems to settle, and the party is waiting in London, waiting for the world to break again when they finally,  _ finally  _ get the word from Wilde that they aren’t needed anymore. The relief that spreads through all of them is  _ palpable _ , and then they’re all hugging and crying at the idea that this is all finally over, and they did it. The world is safe because of them. It’s a lot to take in; it’s no surprise that Cel goes out to the balcony and sees Hamid carefully trying to hide his tears as he stares over the city. They don’t say anything. They just go over and stand next to him, a silent presence, and he doesn’t remark on the silent tears slipping down their face either.

But, as with all things, this too comes to an end. A hotel room in London is a lovely place as any to be with your friends, but with news of the war being truly, completely over, they all slowly come to the realisation that they need to move on.

Everyone eventually... splinters isn’t the right word, really, because they’re all very much so still together, just… in different  _ locations,  _ which is less ideal than Cel wants, because they miss everyone, but they do  _ get  _ it. People have a home; they have a place to return to, somewhere they want to be, and Cel has that too, with the village, but it never felt like where they truly belonged. 

Azu and Hamid are the first to leave, after they save the world, and they both go to Cairo; Azu is finishing up her training to become a High Priestess, with her pilgrimage complete (and living with Kiko), and Hamid is helping Saira out with the family business until their father’s sentence is completed. Zolf is heading to Somerset for a bit, revisiting the home he left so long ago, and then no one’s really sure what he’s going to do next, but it’s probably either going to be in Cairo with Azu and Hamid or on the coast, somewhere. Cel also isn’t completely sure where Friedrich and Siggif are, just that they joined on as permanent members of Earhart’s crew for the time being. Wilde will be staying in England for the time being, apparently intent on settling a few of his affairs before going off on what he called “a bit of a bender”. Cel wishes him well. 

Cel ends up being one of the last ones still in the hotel room as everyone slowly moves on to the next stage in their lives - Carter and Barnes are there as well; Carter and Zolf will be leaving the next morning (to very different locations), but everyone else has gone their separate ways, and it’s… well, after months of spending time in close quarters with  _ everyone _ , it’s strange for it to be this empty. 

It’s tonight that Barnes pulls Cel out onto the balcony and asks, completely seriously, if Cel wants to come to the coast with him and build that boat they promised. Cel doesn’t have to think about it before they agree, wrapping him into a tight hug and talking all about the different types of fishing they can do on the coast. Barnes’ eyes shine, and Cel doesn’t mention it, and they set their plan into motion. 

They get lucky; there had been a Harlequin safe house on the coast, overlooking the Channel, and with the world back in order and the Meritocrats gone, there hadn’t been much need for it anymore. It had been easy enough for Cel to convince Wilde and Curie to let them have it. Einstein comes by to bring them over - he’s even higher in the Harlequins now, and Cel has a  _ lot  _ of ideas for mass teleportation that they want to discuss with him at some point, but this isn’t the time.

It isn’t a question when Barnes takes Cel’s hand, hands fitting together as though they were always meant to, as they’re teleported, and it isn’t a question when Barnes doesn’t let go of their hand when they all land. It isn’t a question when Cel pulls him through the house, excitement overflowing as they point out every nook and cranny and every way they can improve the place until it’s up to their expectations. It isn’t a question when Barnes follows Cel to the makeshift mattress they’ve got set up in the center of the largest room, and if there’s a second of hesitation before they both lie down together, Cel wrapping their arms around Barnes’ waist as they press against his back, it’s gone soon enough anyway. 

The next morning, though, Cel  _ does  _ wonder why they’re so warm when they wake up. It had been pretty cool the night before, but when they come back to consciousness it’s like they’re asleep in front of a furnace. Their brain is a little scattered, the way it always is in the mornings, and so it takes them a bit longer to remember that they’re not back at the village in Japan, that they’re in… Europe, for the first time ever. On the coast, in a nice little house with -

Their eyes shoot open as it all comes crashing back into their head; they glance down, and it’s no longer a question why they’re so warm. 

Barnes’ arm is over their waist, head tucked into the crook of their neck. Their legs are tangled up with his, calves and ankles pressed together in an attempt to be as close as they possibly can.

Cel’s breath catches in their throat, stops, and for the first time in a while they don’t actually have something to say. They just… look at him. The way his hair falls across his eyes. The small white scars that they can see peppered across his face, remnants of battles that he survived. The way his freckles seem to almost shimmer in the light of the early morning sun. His chest, rising and falling as he breathes, steadily,  _ freely,  _ for what Cel thinks is the first time in ages. The tension is gone from his face, lines smoothing out the way that Cel’s always tried to imagine, looking at him. The sun plays over his body, casting little shadows on the plane of his face. 

Their hand rises, brushing away the little pieces of hair across his forehead, and he stirs, chest rumbling. Cel freezes, heart beating; they hadn’t meant to wake him up, not really, but now he’s up, and they’re going to need to talk, and Cel doesn’t want to break the little moment they’ve created.

Barnes mumbles something, getting a bit closer to Cel, as though that’s even possible, with how tightly they’re pressed together. His hair tickles the underside of their chin, and Cel feels their pulse spike at the sensation. It doesn’t last long - Barnes stirs again, and opens his eyes, yawning as he rests his chin on Cel’s shoulder and looks up at them. 

“Morning,” he says, sleepily. His eyes are dark brown and warm, and they shine in the light of the room. Cel realises how close they are, but doesn’t move back. 

“Morning,” they say, uncharacteristically muted. “I, er - I just woke up too, I’m not - I’m not just sitting here staring at you. Unless you’re okay with that, in which case I suppose I could pretend I was? But we, er - I didn’t  _ mean _ to end up like this. I just woke up and your arm was there, and my arm was here, and we were kind of  _ tangled?” _

“Oh, sorry,” Barnes says. He rolls off of Cel, then, onto his back as he stares up at the ceiling. He stretches, joints pulling and cracking as he moves. 

“I didn’t… it wasn’t  _ bad, _ ” Cel says, and Barnes turns his head, considering them. 

“You planning on staying?” he asks, and it’s casual and curious in the way he always is, and Cel rolls onto their side, staring at him. Barnes is, as always, hard to read, but they think that they can catch a glimmer of hope in his eyes as he looks at them.

Cel wants to. Cel really,  _ really  _ wants to. It’s not just because of how  _ nice  _ Barnes is, or of how he makes them feel welcome here, or how he’s finally starting to feel like home in a world where Cel doesn’t completely remember what it feels like to have one. It’s not just because the ring on their finger (old, stained, half-rusted by this point) feels as light as it ever has. It’s all of these things, and more, wrapped up in a neat little package, and Cel wants it, clings to it so desperately that they’re not completely sure how Barnes can’t see it. 

“If. You want me to?” they say, instead of the 1000 things swirling around inside of their head for once. It’s - okay, so, Cel is a scientist, they know all about hypotheses and observations, and about  _ questions,  _ but there’s just something about asking a question you already know the answer to that makes their soul light up. Or maybe that’s just the look on Barnes’ face, somewhere between peace and certainty and acceptance. 

“I do,” Barnes says, and, well, maybe it can be that simple. 

Maybe they  _ can  _ just have this, without any of the messiness and the complication and the anxiety and the worry; maybe this is something that can be simple, can be sweet and loving and  _ good  _ and Cel doesn’t have to second guess it in the end.

They lift their hand - it’s surprisingly steady, even with the swell of emotions rising in their chest, and they don’t hesitate before they rest it on the side of Barnes’ cheek. 

“Is this okay?” Cel asks. His cheek is rough with stubble, but they don’t really mind; it makes them feel more permanent, makes  _ him  _ feel more real. 

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, and then his hand comes up and rests on top of theirs. His hand is warm and strong, and his fingers fit perfectly in the spaces between theirs. Cel can feel the blush spreading through them, stretching up their back and neck and making itself known in their cheeks. Barnes’ thumb brushes across their knuckles, and then his hand disappears. Cel misses the warmth, but it doesn’t last long until he rests his hand on their cheek and tug them in until their foreheads knock against each other. 

“Is  _ this  _ okay?” he asks, no louder than a whisper. This close, Cel can feel his breath against their lips, and his nose against theirs, and - well, nothing has felt  _ this  _ okay in a while.

“Yeah,” they say, and let their eyes slip closed as their own fingers tense against Barnes’ cheek, before sliding around to the back of his head and playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

Their head is quiet, in ways it hasn’t been since - well, probably since they were first married. It’s been so  _ long  _ since their head hasn’t been racing ahead, trying to keep themselves and the people they care about safe. But here, now, with him… it’s quiet. Peaceful. A nice change, all said.

Yeah. Yeah, they’re definitely staying.

**Author's Note:**

> they don’t even kiss in this and im still just absolutely frothing at the mouth wtf
> 
> not pictured: barnes waking up for the first time after not having nightmares and realising that cel being there is the reason he didn’t have any


End file.
